Big heart syndrome

Having a big heart SUCKS! Yes I know this cause I also suffer 4rm this disease of adulation! There are people out there who just don't care, u could fall off the edge of a cliff and they wouldn't even blink twice! Why is it then that I care so much? One of my friends told me that this big heart of mine is the reason why people take advantage of me, I admit it hurt to hear those words but then again she was being a true friend and only helping me out! I've always had a problem of being too empathetic, I can't help but make someone's problem my own! I'll do a somersault and a back flip 2 help a friend in need! The only problem is majority of the time when I'm in the darkest hour only a few of the buddies are ever there for me! I think this problem starts when you become so attached to people that you put them on a pedestal that they will not live up to.. And when we realize this our big hearts have mini heart attacks which oftens smashes us! I'm not saying caring is a bad thing don't get me wrong but sometimes we tend to let the people that don't deserve us so much power to hurt us! This is a hard lesson I learnt in the previous year, sometimes the people we love don't love us as much as we do! And that is where toxic relationships come from, these people take advantage of you and then they come back and act as if nothing happened and that's because you and your big heart have forgiven and forgetten! I'm not saying forgiving someone for what they have done to you is a bad thing but let's b realistic here... You don't just forget how someone screwed you over(it hurts like hell) and that crack will always be there in your beautiful friendship vase! But because of your big heart once again let that person in! I had a friend once who drained the living daylights out of me! It was always about her and never anyone else! I felt like I was her servant at all times! This one time we had a falling out( and they happened a lot) and she called my friendship( and I qoute) "a cheap condom" on a social network! She went on and on and even sweared at me! We agreed that we weren't meant to be together so our friendship ended ( that's what I thought.... But not for long). But the following year when we returned to school something had happened concerning her, and the first person my other friend called was me to help her out! I was so angry but I found myself walking to her room, and getting her out of there and into class! I cried after that cause I couldn't believe how I had helped her although she had said my friendship was like a cheap condom! After that I chose to forgive myself and then her! For me that was toxic and at times I blamed myself, but we need 2 remember that although we have big hearts they r not there to be abused!

Ps: "Love the ppl who treat u right, forget about the ones who don't, & believe that everything happens for a reason."

So if someone wants 2 leave let them go, them going doesn't define you...